by billy on March 17, 2011

Hi everyone!

I just came back from California (say it with an Arnold accent it’s funny)
I feel refreshed, even though I was stuck at Ohare the whole night coming back, sleeping on a torn cot while dickhead airport workers grinded the floor all night. idiots

But I learned a lot about balance firsthand, being a New Yorker, an overagressive one if you know me well enough… Sometimes I can get too carried away.
But being out in Santa Cruz in over ten years has changed my life. It wasn’t the geography really, although it’s really beautiful; the fog on the horizon looking like a line of cloud mountains… I have to stop myself. I could write a whole book on it that’s how beautiful.

But what I want to talk about is the people. My aunt’s fiancĂ©e was telling me what it was like coming out from Michigan, from a very tempered red meat eating family. he say’s, “if you act belligerent out here, even if you are 100% right, people will just shutdown and think ‘why is this person yelling’, and will not listen to you”. So basically if you want to live out there you have to be more relaxed. Which is a goal for everyone right?

wrong. I feel sometimes you need to express anger, just control it. and to make a point, I don’t think people are all passive out in Santa Cruz, I think the aggressive people sometimes just become passive aggressive. They wait for you to explode, so like my future uncle says, they can shut down and have a reason to ignore you. It’s like a fucked up game of Chess!

If I didn’t have a core of great friends out here I’d probably move out there though. You’ll live 10 years longer. and the record stores… don’t get me started I’ll cream my pants.

while out there I was reading The Replacements: All over But The Shouting by Jim Walsh. It’s an oral history transribed into a book. amazing. ill have to lend it to all of you. One thing, of many, that people recount over and over again is that The Replacements stank 9/10 times, but that tenth one man was the best show in the world. And if you’re there youre blown away. You’d have to be pretty passive to see a band a tenth time though if you didn’t like the first nine right? Well let me just say that The Replacements are a band that gets more popular every year

So my point is that if you get invited somewhere to do anything, even if you have dispositions or if you are lazy, just fcking go! really! you may love it!

Like to all you people who get our Brooklyn What invites who only came and saw us once like 3 years ago! (haha sorry to advertise)

and go to (with Arnold accent) California!


dear billy i never read this “rant” before. i wish you were here right now to tell you how funny and true your essay is. and how your aunt and joseph are now married and he is your uncle. and how they remember your last trip to california with expressions of everlasting love. dear billy i hope heaven is ten times as beautiful as the scenery in california and the people in heaven are just to your liking. and dear billy…the people of earth miss you

by steve cohen on March 19, 2011 at 10:18 am. Reply #

all along the watchtower of marshmallow clouds and blue balinese waters you float…… is me who sees the pine cone fall, the leaf waft sinuously and i know……..

by bonnie gresack on March 23, 2011 at 3:09 pm. Reply #

Dear Billy My beautiful enlightened nephew I treasure and am forever grateful for your visit ! You are pure inspiration pure music you are an open incredible path of creativity compassion & wisdom and friendship I treasure every moment of that timeless space we entered making music talking listening adventuring it will always be “The Greatest ” We are connected I Love You Everyday and Forever and send my love to you everyday Thank you for taking the time for your visit It was a gift a blessing from you I cherish you I miss you my darling nephew.

by Laurie Ann Lemmer on March 27, 2011 at 4:54 am. Reply #

billy it is one year now and i miss you more than ever… i hope you are happy and at peace,, all my love aunt bonnie

by bonnie gresack on June 30, 2011 at 12:32 pm. Reply #

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